Finding Belonging in the SEND Journey

Embarking on the journey of discovering and navigating all things SEND (Special Educational Needs and Disabilities) can be incredibly isolating. There were days when I felt utterly despondent, alone, and overwhelmed. The sense of isolation was compounded by the constant gaslighting I faced, making me question my instincts and decisions. I desperately needed reassurance—proof that I wasn’t alone, that there were others like me and like my child. I craved a sense of belonging and guidance to make sense of how upside-down everything felt.

It was during one of these particularly heavy moments that I stumbled across Eliza Fricker on Instagram. Her posts were simple yet powerful: beautifully illustrated words that spoke directly to the struggles I was living every day. Each post felt like a lifeline, offering validation and understanding. Through her, I found a community—an unspoken reminder that others out there truly understood what I was experiencing.

Without hesitation, I ordered her book, Can’t Not Won’t. It arrived at a time when I was completely overwhelmed by life. The book, filled with poignant illustrations and reflections, was exactly what I needed. Unlike dense, text-heavy guides, its simplicity offered a clarity and comfort I could absorb even in my exhausted state.

As I turned each page, tears streamed down my face. For the first time, I felt seen. Our family wasn’t strange, odd, or wrong. The illustrations and words reassured me that it wasn’t my fault. It wasn’t because I hadn’t set enough boundaries, been “tough enough,” or done more. It wasn’t me at all.

This realisation was profoundly empowering. Eliza’s work didn’t just help me feel less alone—it gave me the strength to embrace our journey with renewed confidence and compassion.

If you’re feeling lost in the whirlwind of SEND, I wholeheartedly recommend exploring Eliza’s work. Whether through her Instagram posts or her books, her honesty and creativity might just give you the sense of belonging and reassurance you’re searching for.

Remember, you are not alone.